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Saturday, April 19, 2008

Overcoming Emotional Anger

Feelings and emotions are basically the essence of our lives, but anger is one feeling that can destroy us. Coping with anger is not an easy task to achieve, but it is not impossible. We see that, with enough will power, we can climb large mountains, so we need to think that anger is just a mountain that we can climb to the top of with simple anger management techniques.

Anger can sometimes become the dilemma of our lives. As it tries to take control of our minds, our whole being can be subjected to different changes. As a consequence we can find we are no longer in control of ourselves and anger has ultimately taken charge.

Emotions of anger can arise when we are afraid of something. Fear is always the underlying root cause of anger, and in the surge of these emotions we may act out violently to protect ourselves. By acting out violently we are not ,in fact,protecting ourselves or practicing good anger management skills, but in reality we are creating more problems for ourselves.

When we feel threatened we are likely to react to feelings of fear and anger every time we do not have the power to decipher the underlying cause that actually made us angry. If we are incapable of getting to the underlying reasons of our anger then the result is not going to be a good one. Our lack of anger management will undoubtedly only cause more problems.

Consider yourself in a situation where you are threatened by some people. Now there are two basic ways to deal with this situation, as follows:

1. First of all you get an anxiety and panic attack, but you need to contain yourself and think how you can get out of this problem. You must try to calm yourself down however difficult this may appear to be at the time. When you feel a bit more relaxed, talk with the people who are offending you. Find out what they actually want, and try to explain and discuss what is bothering you. If you are successful in engaging them in a conversation then you are likely to find the solution to the problem. This is a great anger management tip.

2. The person with anger management problems will deal with this situation in a very different manner. The person will be frightened first of all, and then this fear could lead them to act violently. If this happens they will inevitably make the situation worse because of their anger and their uncontrolled emotions. The uncontrolled and overwhelming emotions can lead to fighting with the people who threatened us.This will obviously not help the situation at all , in fact , it will most likely result in a far more hazardous situation. This is certainly not displaying any kind of anger management.

The best way to deal with any situation is to stop and think whether it really is worth getting angry and emotional and possibly depressed about. If yes, then try to use your anger in a positive way. Use it creatively to think it through and find a solution to the problem. Talk to the people who are irritating you rather than becoming violent and possibly inflicting injuries on them or abusing them verbally. By law you are certainly given the right to protect yourself, but you certainly have no right whatever to harm or abuse anyone, either verbally or physically.

There is no doubt that there are some situations where you are going to find yourself with no option left other than defending yourself physically from the other person or persons. But even if you find yourself in such a situation always remember to stay in control mentally. You should always use anger management techniques to keep yourself in control. The moment you lose control mentally and let your anger take over you will then have lost all sense of self control.

Do not do this to yourself, because when anger takes over it will lead you into doing things that you would never ever normally choose to do. Your lack of anger management will make you prone to do things which you would ,under normal circumstances, find totally unacceptable.

In summary , always use your will power and self control when you find yourself in a confronting situation. This can certainly prevent you from becoming a victim of negative anger. Use your anger management strategy. Use your emotions of anger in a positive way. Don't let your anger take charge of your life.

Article written by Norman Holden editor and owner of http://www.AngerManagementNow.com a website about Overcoming Emotional Anger

Visit his website on a regular basis for up-to-date news and help.

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